Several months ago, my wife got a notice that her High School Reunion was being held on the weekend after Labor Day.  She has been in touch with several individuals and is excited to go.  I understand why – she was a misfit in High School and wants to let them know that she is successful and well-respected.   She has already learned that for many of the girls she envied – High School was their Glory Days.

I went on-line and tried to find out information about my Reunion – after all we both graduated in the same year – albeit – 400 miles apart.  Could not find anything.  Good.

In today’s mail, there it was – a save the date card for June 22 and 23.  Two days – I don’t have enough to talk about for 2 hours. 

We were the Class of ’62.  It has been 50 years since I have seen 99.9% of these people.  I didn’t like them then.  The teachers  and some of my classmates are dead or in Nursing Homes.

High School was not my best time.  I was not one of the Cool Guys and to make matters worse – in my Freshman year, my brother was a Senior and He was Mr. Cool.  The comparison was painful – for both of us.   

There is only one thing left to do: Double Down.  I need to get back to my lightest weight and pump up my muscles.  Luckily I still have most of my hair and it is only sprinkled with gray. 

I have enough time to do this:

  • 20+ weeks, or
  • 142 days, or 
  • 3408 hours, or
  • 204,480 minutes, or
  • 12,268,800 seconds

Anyone know where I can buy some Roids?

My stomach hurts.